Just the other day I had an interesting encounter with a friend on facebook where they took a compliment I made and interpreted it as a backhanded insult, which was not at all how I meant it. When they asked me about it in a private message I shared with them that was not how it was meant, yet the conversation turned into more and more misunderstandings, misinterpretations, and miscommunication.
Afterwards I felt really drained, cast down, hurt, wounded, and very misunderstood. Being a sensitive and an empath I often take on the energies of others, most especially when those energies get directed towards me. Not only that, but I am not hurtful or mean in any way, at least I certainly don't intend to be that way, so when someone takes what I say and misconstrues it into something else entirely it feels very hurtful.
What is really going on here? We as individuals all have different experiences that happen to us in life, from childhood all the way into adulthood, all of which helps to construct and mold our belief systems and attitudes about things. This is often the place where we are coming from when it involves communication with others. This is why others can often hear or see things differently from what we meant, and it's also where we have our own misinterpretations of things as well.
Therefore in the case of what happened with me on facebook that day, I was taking the things she said in a different way she meant them and she saw what I had said in a whole other way than I had intended as well. It was as if it didn't matter what either of us said, the other was going to take it wrong no matter what and it all had to do with our own individual interpretations and internalizations other than what was actually being said. I don't believe that what was really going on had anything to do with what was said, and really had to do with how we were reading it.
That is one of the many reasons why I dislike texting and messaging. It is so much better when you can actually talk to the person and hear their voice, and have a better idea of what they are trying to say. That doesn't mean we don't misinterpret things when talking to people, because we certainly do, it's just that it can help to hear the tone of voice and see the expressions on their face. It also allows us the ability to bridge the gap and talk things out for a better understanding of each other if misunderstandings do arise.
With this recent turn of events, I have decided to take a break from social media for a while. I feel the need to turn inward and focus on myself, and work on my mindset for a bit. Taking internal inventory and making sure that I am not still holding on to things that no longer serve me. Things like a lack or fear based mindset, any negative self talk, and other self defeating behavior that may have come up to be addressed.
Most things in life, especially the harder things, come up to make us pay attention to something, to help us become more aware so we can improve those things in our lives. So often when these situations arise it has nothing to do with the other person, what they did, or said, and has more to do with how you are reacting to them, and how you are interpreting it.
How are you all dealing with these types of situations out there?
Have you gotten to a place where you are able to look within and see what is coming up for you?
Be open to that, take an inventory if need be, and heal through it.